Yeah Snitches

(Imagine hip hop beats in your head)

I got pages
that go on for ages
451 fahrenheit cos my binding’s tight
pull back the covers and climb inside
with the content I’m crammed with
keep you terrified

uh huh


to me the publishing game
it ain’t no thing
whether you bind perfect
or with a ring
keepin’ it black n’ white
’cause it’s more real
uh huh yeah what up
my total skill.

uh huh


I’m a pen master
spell caster
don’t got no wizards hat
use a motorcycle helmet
it’s faster
drawing runes and spells to scare ya
I’m a rockin’ solid mutha
And I just don’t care yeah.

(lyrics from Street Zine Machine by Hipper Hopper JB Bopper MC © 2011)

Him no prick get me.

Photos by Rasmus Stolberg

Get A Tattoo

If you want to get these things tattooed on your scaly hide then print out the jpeg, take it to a tattoo artist and get it done. Then send me a photo or photos or ideally video in close up of you being scarred for life… I’ll then post your photos/videos here. And send you a free gift as yet unspecified. Instant ignominy!

Bike Polo Print – Very Limited Ed. 3 only avail.

Made as a very limited edition in collaboration with French edition printer ‘Eugene Et Pauline’ for the Terrain Bike Polo show in Rouen, France. This silkscreen print depicts three bicycle polo players fighting over the ball. 50cm x 70cm super high-quality two colour hand-pulled silkscreen print. Signed in an edition of only 15 prints. £60.00 incl. FREE Postage to UK & most EU Countries
For more details: click here

Ruining Christmas With Jean-Paul Sartre

Hello again wellwishers…

Just starting a new collaboration that I wanted to tell you about. A very exciting project with a French philosopher. He’s called Jean-Paul Sartre and he’s agreed to write some pithy stuff about Christmas for me which I’m going to weave into my tapestry of disappointment. The project is called ‘Ruining Christmas’ (Ruiner de Noël) – and I think it’s going to work out great. Hopefully available as a book to order soon as the ideal Christmas gift. I may even be translating some of his stuff into French. It will probably lose some nuances, but I would hate for his native audience to miss out.

My bro Jean-Paul.

Business Graffiti

So, you own a hugely successful graphic design and art brand ‘Obey’. What could be better than coming to a city and co-opting protest politics to help increase your profile and sell more products…

I’ve annotated the images so you can see what is really there… a bit like in the film ‘They Live’ by John Carpenter, where Shep Fairey ‘appropriated’ the word ‘Obey’ in the first place…

“…go home yankee hipster…” – gotta love it…

Playstation3 – Downloadable Theme

Ups and Downs – Theme for Playstation3

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. But you never stop playing. Dirty dishes, tangled cables, occasional dangerous trips into the real world and sometimes a rather limited diet… well, we’ve all made sacrifices. At least your thumb muscles are epic.

Downloadable from the Playstation Market (look in your Playstation)

Animation for Pop Video – Pollyn

My friend Adam asked me to make a vast army of running stickmen for his band’s new video. It really helped me get my animation chops up to speed. I started by videoing real runners from my bicycle to get a perfect side on position. Then splitting the video into frames, then drawing stickmen over the video frames. About four weeks work for a few seconds animation. Worth it! Great song too…

Student Graduation Hat – Studenterhuen

It’s graduation week for high-school students in Denmark… everyone gets a graduation hat. And then the drinking begins.

There are a huge number of hat related graduation traditions. For example:

Everyone in your class writes their name in your hat.
The person with the biggest hat size buys everyone a beer.
Your best friends must bite the brim of the cap.
Each time you see the sunrise you get a notch in the sweatband.
Stay awake for 24 hours and you get to wear your hat backwards.
Have sex with a classmate you used to hate and get a square notch in the sweatband.
Drink a case of beer and wear the bottle cap as a badge.
Get your stomach pumped and tear off the brim.
Fuck the doctor or nurse and take off the chinstrap.
Bathing nude and get waves drawn on your hat.
Fuck a biology teacher and draw a beetle.
Sex with the hat on? Draw lightning on it.
Drunk under the table get a notch cut in the sunshade / peak.

and more and more and more…

Where Do Ideas Come From? Part II

As we all know, there is no such thing as copying because all the ideas in the world are in a big cloud that anyone can borrow from. It’s called the internet. By pure co-incidence, the company ‘We Are What We Do’ has used a style of typography so very similar to my work for their latest enviro-cash-in shopping bag horseshit. Just like they totally co-incidentally channelled Parra in their last design by accidental inspiration project ‘I Am Not A Plastic Bag’ with Moira Hindley. Why re-use plastic bags when you can re-use other people’s illustration styles?

But don’t despair. I have the solution. The bag you really need IS plastic. You need the Jody Barton Kevin Spacey Art Student American Beauty Plastic Bag. A premium quality 5p plastic bag with the ghostly visage of the late Kevin Spacey. Guaranteed to blow in circles in the lightest breeze. Please select clockwise or anti-clockwise model at checkout.

Tokyo Launch – Black Humours

My new Japanese T-shirt label ‘BLACK HUMOURS’ made in collaboration with Junichi Hirasawa, will be having it’s launch event at the super-cool Utrecht bookshop and gallery store ‘NOW IDeA’ in Tokyo on Tuesday 19th April. The showroom will continue until Sunday 1st May. As well as the collection of amazing new T-shirts there will be signed prints, signed copies of the Black Masters book and other zines by me too. Please go along if you’ll be in Tokyo then. We will also be taking wholesale orders. We’ll be showing more than 20 designs, including shirts, some girls clothes and maybe accessories.

Black Humours – Tokyo Showroom
Tuesday 19th April until Sunday 1st May
2F 5-3-8 Minami Aoyoama
Minato-ku, Tokyo
(closed Mondays)

Haruki Murakami – IQ84 cover

Damn and blast! I really wanted that job. Oh well, I tried my best. Despite writing twice to the publisher and having done the cover to Murakami’s previous title: “What I Talk About When I Talk About Running”, I didn’t get the job of doing his new book IQ84.

I did do some ideas as part of my proposal – so I might as well share then here. Shame they won’t ever be wrapped around the great man’s words.

Drawings From Magazines

Take a big collection of porn, contact mags, fashion mags and plain old ‘style’ rags. Do a lot – I mean hundreds – of drawings from the magazines, mostly respecting the viewers foreshortened perspective while reading and then arrange lovingly in a pocket sized book which shows both the front and back of all the drawings. The back of a marker pen drawing is beautiful I think.

78 pages of dire filth. Delivered.

£9.50 from my store: